A NOTE FROM MR SENSIBLE,

THIS LIG OCCURED WHEN MR COULTARD WAS INDEED FIGHTING FOR THE CHAMPIONSHIP AND THINGS WERE A TRIFLE MORE INTERESTING THAN THE CURRENT SEASON WHERE IT'S NOWT BUT A ONE DONKEY RACE. YAWNS ALL ROUND I'M AFRAID!

Blimey folks - I'm aware that in these days of the 'great car economy' and with that oil lovin' maniac Bush holed up in the White House for the forseeable future that to admit to having an interest in motor sports would seem to be a bit 'crap' but there ya go... I know its daft but come Grand Prix weekend I gotta get me some F1 action, blah blah...

So when that nice chap Mark Bannister (yes, him of OD message board infamy) invited me down to an F1 photo launch thingy that he had organised... wot with free booze and scantily clad models and all that... yer ol' mate Cap found the offer impossible to refuse.

Theres a lorra lorra cash floating around Bernie Ecclestones daft circus and I did me best to get an invite to the race in Monaco next year... and a sumptuous banquet or too for good measure, belch!

The question was - which team would the Damned sponser... not bloody Maclaren - they've got more than enough as it is... or the other front runners. Perhaps Tom Walkinshaws plucky Arrows team, or Eddie Jordans buncha rock n' rollers... though the Stranglers are well in there already I hear, drat.

Anyway - yours truly had a good ol' chinwag over a fair few bevs with some of those wacky F1 drivers... and a good time was had by all!

I had to agree with Schumi... of course he's the best of the current bunch and his natural talent looks like winning him another title - despite that sour old loser Ron Dennis and his more powerful Maclaren Mercedes' engine.	"Ere Jaque me ol' china - ow long are yer gonna hang around the back o' the grid driving that useless ponced up fag packet on wheels?"	The Damned message boards resident know-it-all Mark Bannister and I share a joke with Olivier Penis.	Saubers done OK for young Kimi 'ere and the best of luck to 'em I say - but shouldnt one or two of those overpaid undertalented tossers in the top cars make way for some new faces.
Well, if it aint DC - the whinger... nothings ever his fault... move over ya peasants - hes fighting for the championship, doncha know!	And heres his chum Bernoldi who somehow held up Coulthard for 40 laps around the Monaco course while driving a camper van.	And heres Schumi mk2 (Ralf) who is gonna have to kick his brothers butt 1st if he wants to win 'owt.	"Oy Rubens ya dirty sod - get ya nose oughta me bleedin' beer"